princeship | (no subject)

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Breakfast for him normally consisted of whatever the hell Shizuo had in his fridge that wasn't a hugeass slice of cake, and a cigarette. Contrary to popular belief, Delic did not simply wake up bringing sexy back (though on some days, he'd be willing to argue that statement), so after he had a bite to eat he's usually relocate to the bathroom to primp himself up for the day.

Today's menu was something that looked barely edible, a glass of orange juice and some crackers. He really would have to goad Shizuo into shopping, he remarked lazily as he crunched away and lit up his first cigarette for the day. The nicotine eased a flood of awareness down his throat, eyes closing to relish the moment, and the first exhale was pure heaven. Pink smoke spiralled languidly in the air, and he busied himself with poring over today's ratty old newspaper as he alternated between eating and smoking.

With the way his blond hair stuck up in odd angles he was the spitting image of Shizuo, even with the pink silk boxers stretched across his crotch. A noticeably pinker Shizuo, but anyone who saw him now would think that he was Ikebukuro's Strongest, and he'd be hard-pressed to argue otherwise. This early, he really didn't want to do much of anything except go back to sleep. But alas, bills had to be paid, and food bought, and women had, and ---

A knock at the door startled him out of his reverie and he glanced up. Just who would...?

Ah, well. Shizuo wasn't home, and he doubted the blond would be very happy if Delic ignored whoever came to call. Might be someone important, and all. So he'll just set his cigarette down and pad in all his pink-boxer glory to the door and pull it open.

"Yeah..?"

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Izaya didn't want to be here, of all places. The surrounding area was a enough of a dump as it was, and the stench of tobacco and dairy products that came to his nose as he approached that particular apartment made it all the worse. He thought that the fool named Heiwajima Shizuo would know what air freshener was, but that was giving him far too much credit. Least of all he had work to do, and to leave it sitting idly this early in the morning would yield horrible consequences. He had been fairly tired out the night before, so putting actual physical effort into walking and taking the train to Ikebukuro was much more of a nuisance than usual. There was no particular reason for his being here, not today, but a certain someone had requested a travelling partner for the day.

Psyche had apparently needed something at the apartment. A lost item, a borrowed item, he didn't know and honestly didn't care. But from the way his double pleaded, Izaya felt that Psyche could not trust the Tokyo trains to be safe, even this time in the morning. He was an informant, not a bodyguard, and he was sure that the gentler brunet could handle a trip that lasted less than half an hour. But that ended up not being the case.

A look of surprise came across his face when Delic opened the door, clad only in his underpants, but soon faded when he realized who he was. An exasperated sigh passed from his lips.

"Psyche and I are here to pick something up. I'll try not to disturb whatever morning ritual you've been up to, but I can't promise the same from him."

Of all things to forget at a visit to Shizu-chan's apartment, why did it have to be his MP3 player? He had his library backed up on ample spaces of Izaya's PCs, naturally, but no other device he could transfer them on felt as natural in his hand. Just like Izaya would never quite fancy Psyche's white coat more than his personal black one, there Psyche couldn't replace that little stick of his. A little trip to Ikebukuro was well worth the effort and no, it could not wait.

He nearly had to drag Izaya out of bed but it was a necessary precaution: folks weren't too keen on bumping into Izaya of all people, the ones who knew him anyway, and Psyche was hoping for as few distractions as possible. One minute's delay was another minute he was separated from his holy jackpot built upon loophole pirating.

His companion slugged in comparison the entire way but Psyche rambled on excitedly enough for the two of them. By the time they arrived at their destination, Psyche was already trembling in anticipation. Psyche immediately detaches his death grip from Izaya's arm to Delic's waist, already crying for his long lost object. "I... I lost it! Did you see it? Where is it?"

It wasn't so unusual to see Psyche on his doorstep, but to see Izaya in tow..? And especially when Shizuo wasn't home, how scandalous.

"Yo, Psyche. Iza-chan." He greets each in turn, sleepy expression immediately dissipating in lieu of the sly, confident smile he usually sported during his waking hours. Ever mindful of his nakedness, he leans against the doorway to both assess the visitors on his doorstep and to check up and down the hallway and make sure there wasn't anyone else in tow. He's unsure whether he should be disappointed or not that Hibiya isn't there with them, but then again, it was hard to get Hibiya to come anywhere without his consent.

"Whoa, wait a minute; what did you lose?" He didn't think he'd seen anything out of the ordinary... "Was it --- well, okay." He half-opens the door, just enough to let Psyche through, and steps aside for the brunet to skip in. "Go ahead and look for it. It'd probably be quicker that way."

Izaya simply leans back against the metal fence that separates the higher floor residents from a fall to their death. No way he was stepping into that potential pigsty. He didn't trust any of Shizuo or his merry band of clones to keep the place tidy. Perhaps Tsugaru could have, but with the other residents it seemed unlikely.

"Didn't I tell that I don't appreciate that nickname?" he says offhandedly, not even bothering to look Delic in the face. He didn't want to look at any face like his so early in the morning. "Just because Psyche picked it up doesn't mean you can." Yes, he could tolerate it from his cheerful little doppelganger, but just barely. Anyone else, and he was not happy. Izaya stuffed his hands into his pockets, seemingly bothered by the cold of the morning.

In reality, he was reaching for his knife-- he was out on the town, why not have it?-- contemplating whether or not to give the host a similar little present like he had on the bodyguard. And this time, there was no white shirt, lovingly ironed by his mother, to get in the way. But, he didn't waste his time. Being here was doing that already. He calls out to Psyche: "Did you find it yet?"

With Delic's permission, not that the lack of it had ever stopped him, Psyche bounced into the apartment without a second thought. It was mostly bare but what little there was, he didn't hesitate to turn upside down in the midst of his search. Psyche turned up empty handed after tossing everything upside down, nearly bringing on a bigger tear fest than when he realized it was missing.

He pushed Delic out of the way and tugged needily on Izaya's sleeve. Sure, Delic lived there, but if he hadn't noticed anything strange, then Izaya would be a better search companion. And just in case Izaya considered refusing, Psyche broke out his best puppy eyes. "Iza-chan! I can't find it! You have to help me look!"

Yeah, Shizuo probably wasn't going to be too happy that Psyche left a bigger mess than he should have. Not that it really made much of a difference, since Shizuo wasn't really too keen on tidying up and Delic... Well. Delic just didn't do cleaning.

At Psyche's sudden appearance and the consequent shove he receives he arches a brow, but moved aside anyway without fuss. He turned a grinning face to the waiting informant and cocked his head to the side.

"Yeah, Iza-chan. Better help him look before Shizu-chan gets home, right? Or do you feel up to seeing him this early in the morning?"

Izaya still disdained the petulant name-calling, even if it wasn't so insulting as some of the other appellations he had received. He let out a dry, uncaring laugh as Psyche pleaded for assistance. As unlikely as it seemed from his appearance, his double was an adult, just like him, and was perfectly capable of finding things on his own. But trying to refuse him, especially now, would lead to very disastrous results. He resigned himself to help.

"All right, I will. Just wait a second." Stepping into the protozoan's den was better than dealing with a crying, musicless child in his own. Izaya bounced off the rusted iron supporting him. Before entering, he turned to the blonde at the door. "Get inside before you scare any passers-by with your indecency, Delic."

Psyche tugged at Izaya's sleeve needily until the informant was completely inside and then bounded to the couch. Psyche had already torn aside all the cushions and jammed them back in unceremoniously. He'd managed to scatter anything that was in somewhat an order, leaving a worse war zone for Izaya to sift through.

"Iza..." he moaned, too choked up to finish Izaya's name. He sniffled just before wiping his nose on his sleeve. "Iza-chaaan, it's not here!"

He looked about the place with flushed, puffy cheeks before settling them on Delic. Pointing an accusing finger at the blond, he was ready to burst into another well deserved cry for the lost cause. "You help too!"

He fell to his knees and began crawling around for anything he might have missed on the floor, particularly under the couch and anything shoved against a wall.

"Do you know how many people have seen my 'indecency'?" Do you really want the answer to that question, Izaya? Because he doesn't think he honestly has that many fingers. But he'll close the door anyway, because this early in the morning it's still a little chilly out and he doesn't think Little Delic appreciates the updraft.

He regards the destruction of Shizuo's living room with little more than a sigh and a shake of his head. Dear Shizu-chan was not going to be too happy when he saw the mess Psyche had made. Spotting his cigarette on the ashtray in the kitchen, he makes a move toward it but is abruptly stopped when Psyche points a pink-tipped finger at him and practically demands him to help out.

"Hey... Psyche..." Fuck it, he's picking up his cigarette anyway. "Much as I loooooove seeing you on your knees, I don't think it's under there. Trust me, Shizuo moves the furniture enough to know." Tee hee innuendo.

He ignored the facetiousness behind Delic's question and brushed him off. At the same time, he couldn't do anything but shake his head at Psyche's ineptitude. The people he got stuck with...

"You should have kept better care of it, I told you. Just buy a new one; it's not like they're that pricey."

Izaya sighs and heads for the door. "I'll be somewhere where I can get a decent cup of coffee. Call me when you two are done fooling around."

"Delic, stop looking at that! You should be looking somewhere else!" Psyche darted up with a huff, too intent on his search to feel violated by Delic's frankness. He ran into the kitchen and began to inspect every cupboard, losing patience with each empty rack presented. Focused as he is, Izaya's attempt at another escape doesn't slip by him.

"You're making it sound like me and Delic are doing dirty things!" Psyche complained, head still inside a cupboard and voice nearly echoing off all the thin racks. He slammed the cupboard at another fruitless search. "Don't leave! I really need this one, Iza-chan! I can't buy another... It's irreplaceable! And Shizu-chan's apartment isn't that big so it should be quick!"

As it was, only few places were left for inspection: chiefly the bathroom and the bedroom.

Taking another drag of his cigarette, Delic pauses a moment to allow the smoke to sink into his system before exhaling it out in a steady stream of smoke that coiled lazily into the air. At Psych's outburst, he purposely moves into the brunet's path to keep him from escaping.

"Better hurry, Iza-chan. Dunno when Shizuo might be home, but you probably don't wanna be here --" He gestures to the overturned cushions and mess all over the floor. "--- when he does get home. Yeah?

So!" He claps his hands, and the grin on his face probably isn't good news. "Bedroom?"

"By that logic, I should leave right this moment. Step aside--"

But then he came to a realization. Even if he wasn't physically in the apartment, there was a very likely possibility that Psyche would blab about his presence and within the hour Shizuo would be storming into his office to try and beat him up. He wouldn't be able to, most likely, but the hassle of having to deal with that was much greater than the current one. Izaya gives Delic a good, long, frustrated stare, and moves past him.

"I am willing to give that fool the benefit of the doubt with not keeping an electronic device near water, so Delic's suggestion's probably the more likely. Psyche, check his dresser or something."

"Okay!" Psyche salutes Izaya before marching into the bedroom, setting to search immediately around the suggested area. He takes care not to throw around Shizuo's underwear too obviously. The empty dresser doesn't offer him any leads. Psyche sighs, already at his wits end, and flops back-first onto the mattress. The bed feels mighty nice and he's losing his motivation to keep searching. It's time for a due temper tantrum. "You find it!"

He's not really sure whether Psyche is talking to Izaya or himself, and so he automatically assumes it is the one most beneficial to him. Mainly, the one that doesn't have him pawing through Shizuo's things because God knows what he would find there.

Probably just regular underwear and socks, but hey. Izaya wasn't doing much of anything anyway. Delic was supervising.

Shooting off a cocky grin at Izaya that should have been outlawed in at least ten districts, he makes his way over to the bed to smooth down the rumpled coverlet and takes up a seat next to Psyche.

"Hey. You know what. All that unresolved stress isn't good for you. You probably can't find it cause you're stressed, Psyche." Inhale, exhale. Another stream of pink smoke joins the steadily thickening fog over their heads.

"Know what I'm saying?"

Izaya returns his smirk with an incredulous look and an exasperated sigh. "If you're saying that I should be the one shuffling through Shizu-chan's dresser, you're obviously delusional. That's his putrid clothing, not mine, and it was Psyche's MP3 player that was lost. I'm not your nanny." He turns his gaze towards the other brunet. "You do know what the word responsibility means."

Frustrated and fed up with their tomfoolery, the informant makes an earnest effort to exit the bedroom and the apartment proper. "Don't straggle too much, Psyche, if you want to get back to my home safely."

Psyche sits up with a squint to his eyes. That thing about stress might have resonated within him. Maybe. Before Psyche realizes it, the squint is gone and whatever epiphany he was about to have was lost. He just looks up to Delic, his last hope in this apartment filled with everything except what he's looking for, and asks, "really?"

He jumps off the bed and snatches Izaya's sleeve, attempting to herd him close to Delic. "Wait! Not yet! I think Delic might be right. Iza-chan is really stressed too, right?"

Psyche changes his glance back to Delic, this time fixed with a sort of acceptance and eagerness to give the advice a try. "Iza-chan will deny it but I know he's stressed!"

Of course it did, you are practically a part of Izaya. He would be surprised if there wasn't a little bit of the brunet resonating within him. That was the same with all of the others; he had some of Shizuo's strength, Tsugaru had a little of his calm... There were probably more, he just couldn't really recall them at the moment. Not when he was hooking an arm around Izaya's shoulders and practically shoving him into the mattress facefirst.

"Man, Izaya, I think we gotta get rid of all that tension. It's probably you're fault we can't find Psyche's mp3." He finally puts out the cigarette on the little char mark on Shizuo's dresser. Setting his hands on his hips, he turns to Psyche and issues a single command:

"Strip 'im."

Izaya wouldn't disagree that Delic and Shizuo shared the same disgustingly animalistic brute strength that had him nearly suffocating into the mattress. Of course, the sound of the host's order rendered him even more breathless and speechless.

His speech muffled by the cushioning beneath him, the informant pleaded, "Don't listen to him, Psyche...!" Even as a whisper the anger in his voice could be tasted as much as the menthol puffing out into the air. "You won't let him humiliate me like this, will you?!"

"Really? We're doing that?" Psyche practically sing songs, not even protesting as he jumps on Izaya's waist and sets to removing the jacket. The options aren't many and while it wasn't the first thing on his mind, he can actually conceptualize the merits of this "stress relief". Psyche might toss away the fur-lined jacket carelessly but there's only warmth in the way he snakes his arms around the informant's chest. He bumps his nose against Izaya's neck nearly lovingly but there's an edge in his tone when Psyche whispers into his ear, "we're going to help Iza-chan and then Iza-chan is going to help me. So let's do our best, ne?"

"Naturally."

There isn't really much for him to undress, since he's already practically buck-ass naked. For all his innocence, Psyche certainly was a minx in bed, he mused, something he'd been kind of disappointed he never got a chance to witness firsthand. Damn Tsugaru.

If he played his cards right, maybe that was an experience he'd be able to cross off his bucket list. Two of them, actually, because hell if taking on Iza-chan and Psyche at the same time wasn't one of his basest fantasies.

"Just relax, Iza-chan. We'll take good care of you."

Like he could relax. Izaya had the faintest sense of regret once he had stepped onto the train to Ikebukuro, and this was not helping. He wants to throw Psyche off for manhandling him like this, and the knife sitting in his now discarded coat was too far for his own comfort.

"I don't trust either of you with that. One's lost something he considers precious, while the other is a conniving, sugar-coating host whose job is to falsely praise average women on a daily basis."

If there was anything he could still do, it was berate his sudden assailants. It was better than just sitting idly by as they looked on and his secretary wondered for a millisecond to where her boss could have run off.

"It's not about us, it's about you." Which was true, honestly, though naturally Psyche had something to gain, otherwise he wouldn't bother to take up Delic's advice. He snuggles his cheek between Izaya's shoulder blades. While one hand plays with the hem of his shirt and begins to tug it up, the other strokes up and down the sliver of exposed skin. "Just let us make you feel good."

Shifting his cheek just a little bit, he winks to Delic and peels one hand away to motion to him. "He's resisting!"

"There's no need to be jealous," At Psyche's wink he gives one of his own and makes his way onto the bed next to Psyche. "Hold his arms down.

Now, Iza-chan. Surely you're not shy, right? Cause, y'know," He grins again, cockier than ever. "We can always turn out the lights."

He reaches over to the nightstand and pulls out one of Shizuo's black ties. Ever careful not to stretch the fabric more than he needed to, he works it into a quick knot and hooks it around the brunet's eyes. He draws the knot up and seals it tight around Izaya's eyes with flourish.

"How's that? Better?"

On one hand, he didn't have to see either of their faces. On the other, he was quick to question what in the world he was up to. Not that the answer wasn't obvious enough, but just how this was going to follow through was what concerned him.

"Undo this blindfold this instant--!" Its smell made things all the worse. The nicotine and tobacco stained their way into the silk, became one with the fabric... and it was constantly attacking his olfactory functions. Izaya tried to keep fighting, but was near ready to resign to his fate.

"Psyche, do something to help..."